Putting out an APB for a bald, white male last seen wearing a black hoodie and stealing cupcakes at the Tedeschi’s on Washington Street. The suspect, who store employees say is a regular, has been shoplifting from the Hostess Cupcake rack.
Newton Po do not consider the suspect a threat, unless you are a cupcake. If seen, please call 911. DO NOT try and apprehend the suspect. Current whereabouts unknown — probably creepin on more cupcakes.
Not trying to alarm you guys, but this guy could strike anywhere/anytime. Whole Foods, Keltic Krust, anywhere they make or sell cupcakes. Be aware of your surroundings. If you are in possession of cupcake(s) watch your six.
Tell you one thing: I’ll sleep a lot easier once this SOB is behind bars. Or at least fined for shoplifting. Stay safe.