Don’t you love how infomercials make a product seem like a total no-brainer? Like when you see the product you think “that would make my life so much easier” or “why didn’t I think of that?”
Well, guess what guys? I just came up with probably the best idea in the history of Randlett Park. All I need is 2 minutes of your time and eventually a bunch of your money. Here’s my pitch…
Tired of shoveling snow for 5 hours everytime we get a nor’easter?
Got a backache, frostbite or pneumonia from the last snowstorm?
Throw that old shovel in the trash! For just 12 monthly payments of $45 — you will never have to shovel again! Because Dave is going to buy the street a brand new Bobcat!
The Bobcat T190 is a 66 horsepower diesel skid steer with narrow tracks, 130″ bucket and 1900lb load capacity. Translation, please? This thing dominates sidewalks. Weighing in at 7,775lbs., the Bobcat laughs at the pile of snow at the end of your driveway. With a 28 gallon tank, I could clear all of Randlett without refueling. Probably in less than 45 minutes.
Here’s how the payment plan works. A Bobcat T190 costs $27,500 – divided by 50 homes on Randlett – equals $550 per house. Divide that by 12 months and you’ve got payments of $45. I’ll just roll down the street on the 1st of each month and you all can throw money in the bucket. Miss a payment, I miss your sidewalks — couldn’t be easier!
Where are you gonna park it? I’ve seen your garage…